[voicemail] You’re relentless woman. But I miss you, and I kind of want you here too. Just pass me soup and Advil under my door. Love you.
David has a lying problem.
David only tells the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth to help him God.
David didn’t have a lifejacket because we all secretly hated him and wanted him to drown. True story.
David didn’t need a lifejacket because he has the body of Chuck Norris and everyone not so secretly envies him. True story.
Gregg, Joe, Dustin, Lorenzo, Lorenzo, Ryder, My dad, Bug, Brandan, Selena, Rossi. (no particular order).